07-Aug-2013   |     |   0

5 Tips to Help a Cyborg Make a Good Impression

For those of you unclear on your science fiction definitions, a cyborg is a race that’s part human and part machine. With the way many people have become dependent upon their mobile devices, it’s almost as if their technology has fused with their bodies. If this describes you, then you are a cyborg.

Being a cyborg is not necessarily a bad thing, in fact, it comes with its advantages, like constantly being connected to a network and having the world’s information at (or in) your fingertips. Although, being a cyborg is not all fun and games (and laser beams), until every human buys into mobile technology and the cyborg takeover is complete, cyborgs will be looked down upon by full-blooded humans.

This type of cyborg discrimination can especially be seen in social situations where humans outnumber cyborgs. Few workplaces have cyborg anti-discrimination policies in place, which means that cyborgs need to be aware of how improper use of their technology may bring scorn from humans. These humans are not necessarily bad people; it’s just that they don’t understand the way of the cyborg. Here are five tips that every cyborg needs to consider before activating their technology while amongst the humans.

Showing Off is Frowned Upon in Human Establishments
One of the ways of the cyborg is to show off their new technology. Humans don’t have this same appreciation for technology. A cyborg that tries to show off their new smartphone to a human will only be met with a blank stare that communicates, “I really don’t care.” Cyborgs should only show off their new devices to humans if they are asked.

Be Mindful of Where Your Cameras Point
Humans are naturally paranoid of cyborgs, and it doesn’t help that cyborgs are often armed with cameras capable of automatically uploading pictures and videos to the Internet. When a human sees a cyborg with a camera, it’s assumed that they’re being recorded, especially when it comes to smart glasses. Always be mindful of where you point your camera.

Humans Require Full Attention
For cyborgs, the ability to multitask is a source of pride. Some cyborgs even know how to text, tweet, and check e-mail, while simultaneously engaging in face-to-face communication. Humans don’t see the value in a cyborg’s multitasking ability; in fact, humans can be downright greedy when it comes to communication by requiring full attention. This means no responding to social media updates, or even texts! It’s unclear how much longer the humans will be able to survive without evolving the ability to multitask, but as long as they are around and have power, cyborgs will be required to give humans their full attention.

Keep in Mind that Humans Don’t Speak Cyborg
Cyborgs love to talk about the newest models of gadgets and how great the newest and most useful apps are, but from a human perspective, all smartphones and apps are the same and there’s nothing you can say to convince them otherwise. If you’re going on-and-on to a human about how awesome your new technology is, then you might as well be talking in binary code because they won’t understand you.

Humans Don’t Use Apps
Cyborgs have an app for everything. Humans have no need for apps and somehow survive without them. You’ve perhaps seen these not so hapless app-less humans. They pay for their groceries using checks, subscribe to magazines, and celebrate holidays with greeting cards. Even though you know of an app that will make a human’s life easier, they don’t want to hear about it because humans are biased towards all things cyborg.

In the future, everybody will be a cyborg. Until this science fiction future becomes a reality, humans and cyborgs will have to learn how to communicate and get along. Cyborgs will need to turn off their devices before having a conversation with a human, and humans should overcome their biases and understand that not all technology is evil.

Are you a cyborg or a human? Do you have any additional technology usage tips you can add to this list? Let us know in the comments!


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